Previously in Power People... > > Divatoxic: Finish them off! > Divatoxic and her dark minions discover the location of the Power Chamber and thus it is destroyed.... again. > > Cassie: our powers... they're gone. > > Chris: Ya notice? > Out of options, the rangers leave earth in the Space Shuttle, vowing to save Zorkon.... Again. It is now three months later... [The Simpleton planet. A small gathering area has been created, wherein every single villain in Power People history is in attendance. There is also a cloaked black figure in there, with no visible identifying marks. Probably nothing important.] Lord Zepplin (Rodney Dangerfield voice): I tell ya. Last time I was in a place like this the Pope was the keynote speaker. [The groupies gathered around him laugh but are obviously faking.] Rhetta Repulsing: Let's go see what's going on over there. Divatoxic: ...So then I managed to blow those rangers into oblivion! Master Smile: Did you use a detonator to destroy the Power Chamber? Divatoxic: Yes, how did you know? Master Smile: Trust me, it doesn't work. [Suddenly, Rhetta bumps into Divatoxic. The crowd goes silent.] Pootie #1: Ut oh... Divatoxic: Oh, it's you... Rhetta: Well, if it isn't little miss perfect. I hear you're still going after the Power People. Divatoxic: Not anymore. I have DESTROYED the Power People! Three months ago, and they still haven't come back, so they're obviously GONE! [The cloaked figure passes by.] Divatoxic: Who is that? I mean, well, somebody had to destroy them. I figured "Why shouldn't I?" [Divatoxic strides off.] Divatoxic: I love being queen. Smelgar: Honestly, I wouldn't know. Rhetta: (hushed, to Zepplin) Is it true? Did she manage to destroy the Power People in less than one year? Zepplin: Well, the tabloids are saying it so I suppose it's true. (Smelgar): Oh, by the way! What's with the hair? Rhetta: grrr... [Rhetta intends to shoot a beam at Smelgar, but misses and hits it directly into the palm of a purple-hair, tight black-spandex/armor wearing woman, who is guarded by several black-and-white gas-mask wearing large, hot pink colored-wigged robots called Pompoms.] Divatoxic: OK, who is that? Smelgar: I hear that's Astronemesis. She's going to try to be the new queen of evil. Cloaked figure: Exactly what is it with this "queen of evil" thing? Divatoxic: It's none of your goddamn business. Cloaked figure: Oh. [The cloaked figure leaves.] 6... 5... 4... 5 [3] 3... 2... 1... [Lost In Space!] Set remotes to outer space now, Budget higher than ever before! Rangers go! [Lost In Space!] Power People go! Power People go! Power People go go go die Power People... [Power People...] Power People Lost... In Space! Gourmet Night presents... (Well, you guessed it) POWER PEOPLE LOST IN SPACE "A Title Best left To The Beginning Of The Turbo Series, pt. 1" (Parody of "From Out Of Nowhere, Part One") [Back on the Simpleton planet, Divatoxic is shoving Pompoms and Pooties alike away as she heads to the main banquet as Smeglar follows, obviously trying to pick up women.] Divatoxic: I'm here, I'm here now, the party can begin now... Smelgar: ... hey, pretty, want my phone number...? Divatoxic: Smelgar! Get over here and get my seat! Smelgar: Geez, sorree! Keep your bustierre on! [Smelgar seats Divatoxic while Goldinski does likewise with Rhetta. Astronemesis seats herself next to General Lee Drunk (thus blinding him) and she looks over the table. The Cloaked figure sees her and they exchange dirty looks.] Zepplin: This aught to be fun. [There is a long pause.] Zepplin: Any time now? [Suddenly, lightning strikes the sky and a certain lava monster from the second movie appears in the sky.] Monster: Ha ha, I am... All: Magic Boar? Monster: No! I'm Dark Flexer, Monarch of all that is not good! Zepplin (rising up proud): That calls for a toast! Dark Flexer: I haven't said anything yet. Zepplin (sheepishly sitting back down): Sorry. Dark Flexer: Now, if I may, I have captured the Mighty Zorkon and am now relieving him of his money! [We all see Zorkon in his tube.] Zorkon: That does it! I'll kill y'all! I'll kick you in the nuts! Dark Flexer: With what? Zorkon: ... ... Oh, yeah. Dark Flexer: Now as his money grows lower, the lava goes higher, exterminating the power forever. [Pause.] Dark Flexer: OK, you can do that toast thing now. Zepplin: Oh. (Getting up) This calls for a java juice toast! [All the monsters drink down and set their cups down, all empty except for the one belonging to the Cloaked figure.] Rhetta: Hey, you on the end with the cape! What are you, too good to drink with us? Cloaked figure: No, it's just the stuff stings my throat. Astronemesis: Don't feed us that crap! He's a spy! MADD representative: Because he doesn't drink, he's a spy? Cloaked figure: Actually, I am a spy. MADD representative: Oh. Dark Flexer: Attack the intruder! [Pompoms approach the Cloaked Figure, who manages to kick them all. Unfortunately revealing to the audience his red pants and white boots.] Divatoxic: Smelgar, do something! [The Cloaked figure leaps onto the table clutching the Spiral Staircase saber in his hand.] Goldinski: Let's lose the cape! [Goldinski throws the cape off.] Zepplin: It can't be! (On the table is a red spandex-wearing figure, clutching his Spiral Saber. His boots and gloves are white, the tops of his sleeves are white for some reason, and there is a sideways bar on his chest displaying other colors. His helmet has a black visor and a black circle on top showing a hologram of an Amana freezer. Around his neck is a western-style bandana.) Zepplin: It's impossible! The Red-Neck Ranger! Divatoxic: Smelgar, do something! Smelgar: On my salary? I don't even get overtime, you cheapskate! Red-Neck Ranger: Malady Bladder, Hang Loose! [The red rocket-powered surfboard lowers itself to the table and the Red-Neck Ranger gets on it.] Dark Flexer: Take this! [Dark Flexer breathes a huge flame of fire at the Red-Neck Ranger, however, flame cannot exist in space and the Ranger is unharmed.] Dark Flexer: Damn! The spy knows my plan! He must not escape! Smelgar: He already did! Divatoxic: Allow me to track down that renegade ranger, big guy, I--- Rhetta (shoving her out of the way): I should be the one to go after that ranger! I've got more experience on this! Divatoxic: Oh yeah? Then why did you always lose? Dark Flexer: Enough! Astronemesis, you will take the Pompoms and the Dorky Fortress and stop him (winks). Astronemeis: Got it (winks back). Rhetta: Well, I guess we know where the real power comes from here. Astronemesis: I'm outta here. [Theleports off. The Pompoms follow.] --- [The Space Shuttle. Cassie, Ashley, and Carlos are watching out the window at a beautiful wormhole opening.] Cassie: It's so beautiful. Chris: What is? Cassie: The wormhole. It's like the one in Star Trek. Chris: There's a wormhole? You mean, we didn't need to have gone through these past three months? TJ: Well, we're here now, and that's important. Ashley: Why does it small funky in here? Chris: I assume it has something to do with the fact no one here has bathed in three months or something. Carlos: It's a distinct possibility. TJ: So, Beta, how long to Elkar? Beta: Elkar is ...hooblie jumbalaya. TJ: Carlos, you had better check him out. Chris: Oh, like he knows what he's doing. Carlos (holding up a computer chip): It looks like his speech circuits were damaged in the explosion. Chris: That's not the speech chip. Carlos: It isn't? Ashley: But why is he malfunctioning NOW? Chris: I don't know. Cassie: Hey, guys, since when did we go back to orbiting earth? Chris: What are you talking about? Cassie (pointing out window): That. [The Rangers all look out the window and see Earth, as well as a blue starship.] Beta: Koobie kalaa! Carlos: It's coming right at us! TJ (punching up comm board): Attention! This is the Space shuttle! Veer off, you're on a collision course. Veer the hell off! [The front of the ship opens up and green rays shoot out and snare the space shuttle.] Cassie: I think it's sending us into it. Chris: I feel so safe. Beta: Kreebulya kamikaze... [The space shuttle lands in the front and is locked in.] --- [Inside the hallway, the rangers check out the hallways looking for the ship's crew.] Kenny: This is weird. [Suddenly, a large orange worm bears down and snatches up Kenny and eats him up before disappearing forever.] Ashley: Oh my god, they Killed Kenny! Chris: I think we've seen enough bad movies to guess that that would happen. [The rangers head off.] Chris: Where are we? Cassie (reading a sign): "Gastro Big-Ship"? Chris: With that kind of name, I expect this thing to burp. [Suddenly, a loud rumbling is heard and BAAAAAA- RAAAAAAAAAPPPPP!!!!!!!] Ashley: Oh, god, that was disgusting! [A wall-mounted lamp begins to follow Carlos.] [The rangers head into what appears to be the engine room.] TJ: This must be the ship's engine room. Chris: What tipped you off, the gigantic engine in the middle of the room, or...? TJ: I'm beginning to wonder if there's anyone even ON this ship. Ashley: Why, because we haven't seen anybody for the past thirteen seconds? [Carlos looks into a lamp-like thing. From it's point of view, a string of binary numbers (somehow including '3') string past as the letters D.E.C.O. are clearly legible at the bottom.] TJ: Let's split up. [Carlos, Ashley, and Chris enter a small lounge-area, where lockers with Ranger-colours and such are present.] Chris: For some reason, I keep thinking of old Zack, the original Black-Hole Ranger when I see this place. Ashley (finding a wall-mounted appliance): "Synthetron"? [Ashley presses some buttons on it. There is a ding and she takes out a fully-prepared turkey sandwich and coffee.] Chris: Coffee! [Chris grabs the coffee, but burns his hands and he jumps around screaming because I forgot to mention that the coffee was not in any holder of any kind.] Ashley (laughing): Oh, geez... [TJ, Cassie, and Beta rush in, all riled up because of Chris's screaming.] TJ: Geez, what the hell is going on in here? Carlos (laughing): Trust me, you wouldn't believe me if I told you. Beta: Keebee zubba neroo kiba... TJ: We couldn't find anyone on the ship. Chris (wincing in pain, his hands between his legs): You only searched for three seconds until I burned myself! Carlos: It looks like someone was here recently. (sees a plate of food). This food is still warm. Chris: How would you know without touching the plat-- Oh, sick!! [The rangers all make disgusted faces at Carlos.] Carlos: Oh, come on! I haven't eaten in three months! Give me a break! --- [In deep space, the Red-Neck Ranger is flying through the galaxy, being chased by two Pompoms, each in their own official Star Wars X-Wings.] Red-Neck Ranger: Merchandising, oh boy! [Takes out his Spiral Staircase Saber.] Pompom #1: (Gurgling sounds) [The ships start firing at him. He manages to deflect the shots off, but one hits his wrist and he drops his drill.] Pompom #1: (gurgles happily) Red-Neck Ranger: That's it! Gastro Plaster! (takes out his weapon and breaks it into two guns) ... Aw, man, I broke it! ...No, wait... it seperates, that's right. I forgot that. [Red-Neck Ranger fires at the ships and they somehow blow up. Then he heads down and grabs his drill.] Red-Neck Ranger: No, back to the ship! [The Red-Neck ranger poses and teleports away.] --- [The Red-Neck Ranger telports into the ship.] --- [The rangers all enter a large Star Trek-style round room.] Ashley: Wow. [Another lamp follows Carlos again.] TJ: This must be the main bridge. Chris: That makes sense. [Beta heads off to a console and types stuff in.] TJ: Do you know what you're doing, Beta? Beta: Hoobi-toobie, simi kala! TJ: Whatever you say, I guess. [One of the doors then opens and the Red-Neck ranger enters.] TJ: Whoa! [The Red-Neck ranger shrieks and runs off, trying to close the door. TJ dashes through the closing door as Ashley just rushes out from the other door.] (Red-Neck Ranger): Intruders! Intruders! ba-ha-ha-ha! TJ: Let's find him! [The rangers go dashing throught the ship and take the ladder down to BigDeck 6. Beta is following them, trying to warn them about something, but can not find them. The rangers near the engine room, but the Red-Neck Ranger is nowhere to be found.] TJ: Where'd he go? Chris: Anywhere but here? [The Red-Neck Ranger leaps from the alternate hall in front of them.] Ashley: (shrieks) Red-Neck Ranger: Screw off! [The Red-Neck Ranger fights the rangers, kicking the males around and punching Ashley and Cassie in their chests (much to the dismay of our GN censors).] TJ: We're not your enemies! [The deck shakes. Red-Neck Ranger heads off into the BigLift and takes off, leaving the rangers to lick their wounds.] Cassie: Was that...? I mean, that was...? Carlos: A Red-Neck Ranger? TJ: But that's my colour! Chris: Not anymore, apparantly. TJ: This must be HIS ship! Ashley: Why would he attack us? Chris: Aside from the obvious...? TJ: He must be under attack! [The ship is getting gunned.] Ashley: I think you're right. Carlos: D-UUUHHHHH!! --- [The Red-Neck Ranger heads into the bridge.] DECO: Sensors indicate BigShip is under attack. Red-Neck Ranger: Astronemesis! --- [Astronemesis's ship appears in the sky and starts blasting the BigShip.] --- [Internal Dorky Fortress, where we can only see Astronemesis (the rest is not constructed), making it look like an English sci-fi movie.] Astronemesis: Fire again! --- [The BigShip is hit by more blasts.] --- Red-Neck Ranger: Whoa! All power to the BigThrusters! DECO: Warning. Sensors indicate that the Engines are failing. Red-Neck Ranger: On screen. [The viewscreen shows the engines are turning off.] Red-Neck Ranger: Oh, man! --- TJ: The engines are down. [The Rangers head into the engine room.] TJ (noticing a flinging cord with sparks coming out of it): Look, it must be that cord. It's come unplugged! Chris: That's it!?! Cassie: Let's hook it back up! [The Rangers go up to the upper level in the room and form a human chain as TJ tries to grab the flaming cord. TJ manages to grab the cord and plug it back in.] TJ: Beta, try the engines again! --- Red-Neck Ranger: Prepare for impact! DECO: BigThrusters are back online. Red-Neck Ranger: You better not be screwing with me again, DECO, full power now! --- Astronemesis: Hold your fire. (holding herself) That was _too_ easy. --- [The ship heads up but still bears down on the planet and crashes.] --- [The Red-Neck Ranger gets hit with the impact and gets flung into the front.] Red-Neck Ranger: Wow. That was cool. (pause) I had better find the intruders. --- [In the Engine Room, the Rangers are all congratulating themselves for the victory.] TJ: Woo-wee! [Chris and Ashley hug and jump around crazily.] Carlos: I feel great! Beta: Hoobie sneeba tuperoo! [The Red-Neck Ranger arrives on the scene.] Red-Neck Ranger: OK, good work, but who are you? TJ: We're the Power People. From Earth. Red-Neck Ranger: Oh. I'm sorry. Carlos: For attacking us? Red-Neck Ranger: No. DECO: Warning, sensors indicate Astrnemesis has landed. Chris: I don't think that's too good. [The Red-Neck Ranger heads off. The rangers follow him. Carlos is the last one to leave.] DECO: You know, you are very attractive. Carlos: Thank you. --- [The Rangers arrive on the bridge, where the Red-Neck Ranger is working at the conn. At this point, the Amana Freezer hologram is more visible.] DECO: Warning, Astronemesis's forces are disembarking. Red-Neck Ranger: Pompoms. Ashley: What are Pompoms? Carlos: Weren't you a cheerleader? [The screen shows squads of Pompoms landing and holding their Klingon swords.] Chris: Crap. Ashley: Again they borrow from Star Trek! Isn't that true copyright infringement? Chris: No. DECO: Pompoms are approaching battle positions against the BigShip. [The Pompoms gurgle.] Chris: Is that a language or are they just plain stupid? [The Red-Neck Ranger heads off into the BigLift.] Red-Neck Ranger: Open the Space Hatch. TJ (stopping the door from closing): We're coming with you. Chris: I'm not. [Beta kicks Chris into the BigLift with the rest of the Rangers. The doors close.] Beta: Goob lub, Snangaas! --- [The Pompoms watch as the rangers all head out of the BigShip as the screen freezes.] to be continued... executive producers CHRIS NEUMANN JEAN-CHRISTOPHE KARIM [Back on the Simpleton planet, the evil | TJ space aliens are still there, continuing | Shellfish Ward their meal.] | | Chris Goldinski: Munch | Guy Inomnate | | Carlos | Roger Tobasco | | Ashley Aktroms: I don't think they're coming | Tracy Lynt Crud back. | | Cassie Zepplin: Don't worry... they'll be | Patricia Ya Man back. | | Voice of Red-Neck Ranger | Christopher Hkayman Islands Lee | | Astronemesis ....... Melody Perkem | Aktroms ............ Waylon Bupkis | Kenny .................... Himself | DECO ..................... Herself | | Featuring: Lord Zepplin, Rhetta | Repulsive, Divatoxic and the | Pompom squad. | | Based on "Power Rangers In Space" | created by Saban. | Zepplin: Yep... any time now. | Protected under the fair-use | parody laws laid down by the first | amendment. | | (c) 1998 Gourmet Night | All rights reserved.